Crumbl Cookies crumbles under high expectations: Review of viral bakery
Most college students have likely heard of Crumbl Cookies, a new trendy bakery that has teenagers and young adults in a chokehold, spawning increasingly long lines and weekly TikTok reviews. But, the sudden rise and allure of Crumbl remains a mystery. Is it due to its eye-catching dessert boxes, or are its product much better than its rivals?
First, there's one aspect most important when reviewing baked treats — taste. Typically, when a bakery or restaurant sells only one food item, you'd expect that food item to be perfect. Crumbl Cookies has the recipe for a great cookie by prioritizing the one thing most enthusiasts want — sweetness.
But, Crumbl Cookies aren't sweet in a satisfying way — after eating a cookie you can almost feel your blood sugar rising. Could Gordon Ramsey take a visit to their kitchen to reprimand the person pouring so much sugar into these cookies?
The texture also deserves critique. You may assume that the cookies will be hard, crunchy and crumble, as its name suggests, but that is not the case. The cookies are quite soft, dense and frankly, seem underbaked. Several more minutes in the oven are desperately needed to make them less raw.
Besides taste and texture, looks are also an important factor to consider, especially considering what Crumbl Cookies is. It's a hip cookie shop — of course, the young consumer base is going to care about the aesthetics.
There's no denying that Crumbl Cookies look very appetizing with its cookie garnishes: frosting swirls, syrup drizzles, colorful sprinkles and so on. The cookies also come in a pretty pink box that many may find worthy of a social media post.
Is that Instagram story even worth it though? Crumbl sells mini cookies and large cookies, both coming at a pretty steep price.
A dozen mini cookies cost $29.99 and a dozen large cookies cost $47.99. For comparison, a dozen donuts from Dunkin' only cost $13.99, which is approximately $1.17 per donut. One single large Crumbl Cookie is $4.99. Crumbl does not sell single mini cookies for a cheaper option.
Another bothersome element of Crumbl is its flavor options. If you were expecting a huge variety of flavors as you would in an ice cream parlor or donut shop, then think again.
Crumbl only has six flavors at a time on its menu. This means that you can't even buy a dozen each in a different flavor. This is part of Crumbl's marketing strategy, which seems to be working for them since customers come back every week for a new cookie flavor.
For those who are health conscious, but just want to enjoy a small treat, Crumbl is definitely not the place for you. One Milk Chocolate Chip Cookie is 720 calories — but let's face it — who can confine themselves to eating just one cookie?
Another, almost sickening, entry is the Tres Leches Cake ft. Lotus Biscoff, which is 1080 calories. The description of the cake says that it is "lightly spiced" and has only a "drizzle of melted Lotus Biscoff," but these words do not correctly depict its nutritional value.
There aren't Crumbl Cookies located on any of the Rutgers—New Brunswick campuses — the closest one is in North Brunswick.
A worthy cookie bakery that can be found near campus is Insomnia Cookies. They are far more affordable, with their cheapest cookies starting at $2.85, and close at later hours. They also sell "Cookie’wiches," a cookie, ice cream fusion that Crumbl has yet to profit off of.
Crumbl Cookies should dissolve in another year or two as most food fads tend to. In the meantime, don't waste calories or money on subpar cookies.
