FUCHS: Empathy is much needed amid difficulties of daily life
Column: Questioning Jules
What does being a good person look like in today’s world?
I am hoping to get the motors in your brain running, to process some tougher questions we all deal with. Every single day, we hear the opinions of others on political matters, religion, entertainment, etc. But how often do we really get to sit back and have philosophical discussions?
The news gives us the "what," but philosophy gives us the "why" and "how." Yes, there is a lot of philosophical thought that comes with discussions on politics and entertainment. Yet, there are deeper underlying questions that must be thought of in order to really understand the world we live in.
Philosophy began in ancient times with great minds like Socrates, Aristotle and Plato. Today, with social media on the rise, there are a lot of new ways to do things and a lot of old questions that resurface. I am not here to tell you how to live your life, or try and convince you that I am perfect — because I am not. Like everyone else, I have made mistakes and have grown from them.
The idea of being a “good” person is one that I have spent a lot of time recently thinking about. It all started when I began binge-watching "The Good Place" on Netflix. The show focuses on a woman, who was not meant to end up in the Good Place after her death but takes on residency there.
The entire show is a debate on whether the characters for their flaws should be in the Good Place or the Bad Place based on the level of mistakes they have made. The show tells the life stories of many others who ended up in the Good or Bad Place and questions how people are judged for their time in the afterlife.
The truth is: There is no clear way to define who a good or bad person is. Good and bad behavior both exist in this world. Both behaviors can be extremely simple or difficult to define. For instance, it is obvious that deliberately cheating or plagiarizing is bad behavior. Acting in such a way is a form of stealing and is almost always done knowingly and intentionally.
Good behavior can be as simple as making sure not to steal work from others, or maybe even helping a friend understand academic integrity if they are confused. Behaviors do not define whether a person is good or bad. In my opinion, to tell if a person is truly good or bad, it is important to view them as holistically as possible.
If the good behaviors in a person far outweigh the bad behaviors, there can be a case made for them being a good person and vice versa. What makes defining a good person so difficult is that, at the end of the day, no matter how someone behaves or treats people around them, you will never know what their true intentions or thoughts are.
It can be hard to tell if someone you have not known for long is truly a good person. With people you do know, it typically can become clear based on their actions. Some basic principles of being a good person, in my opinion, are being empathetic, admitting to and growing from mistakes, being honest and having integrity.
Being empathetic means understanding what another person is feeling or going through and trying to place yourself in his or her shoes. It can be hard to do this at times, because no matter how hard you try, sometimes you simply cannot put yourself in someone else’s shoes.
What is best is to communicate and ask others how you can help them, or even just show them that you understand what they are going through. You can show empathy toward anyone, even people you do not know.
This can be something as simple as holding the door for someone who is close behind you on the way into the same building or waving to the guy who let you go in a merging lane on a busy highway. People who make even those small gestures show that they are acknowledging your existence and respecting your time as well.
Eventually, you will reach the doorknob or the road will clear up, meaning you can open the door for yourself or merge into the highway.
These small actions, though, give us hope that there are empathetic people in the world who think of someone else besides themselves. These actions are not by any means the only actions that should be taken by an empathetic person.
Some other examples can be helping someone out at work when they need a cover, even though you do not feel like going in, or making time to listen to and comfort your friends when they are struggling. You could leave the plate of cookies at the dining hall knowing that those cookies might make someone’s day.
It can be as simple as helping your parent, roommate or whoever you live with by doing chores around the house or meal prepping to take some of the weight off them, being kind to someone who is working in retail or taking the extra step to ask how their days are.
Empathy is extremely important, especially in the days when the pandemic is still going hot and heavy. Nobody is perfect, and nobody necessarily needs to always put everyone else first — this is how people can come to take advantage of your kind actions. It is important to have balance and understand when is an appropriate time to put others first and when you need to put yourself first.
You want to let someone go in a merging lane, but you do not want to be sitting there for an hour because you let everyone go. You want to help the people you live with keep the house clean or prepare meals, but you do not want to take on the entire responsibility of having a home by yourself. Balance is good and healthy, always try to evaluate how appropriate an action is within the scope and your needs.
Julia Fuchs is a School of Arts and Sciences junior majoring in history and anthropology and minoring in French and archaeology. Her column, "Questioning Jules," runs on alternate Thursdays.
*Columns, cartoons and letters do not necessarily reflect the views of the Targum Publishing Company or its staff.
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