5 bizarre foods found in my apartment

I keep asking myself why I have some of these foods in my apartment, and I can't seem to figure it out. I'm just going to blame my dad, since I live with him — yeah, that works. 

1. Canned octopus

Don't ask because I don't even know. 

2. Five month-old Butterscotch Krimpets

Mmm, nothing sounds quite delightful as packaged cakes that have been expired for almost half a year. I really need to re-evaluate my pantry. Thank god I didn't eat those by accident because I probably would've ended up in Robert Wood Johnson. 

3. Black bean pasta

I'm guessing these are from my "clean eating" phase. Yeah, that didn't last long — where's the baked ziti at?

4. Dried prunes

Gramps called, he wants his prunes back. Prunes are the official old person food — everyone knows that. No wonder these raunchy, dried up, shit look-alike dried fruits are not even open in my house. 

5. A plastic-wrapped Belgian waffle

Sounds pretty fresh, eh?